My experience dating a JW : exjw
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If you truly believe this relationship will make you happy for the rest of your life, then go for it. Just never put the idea of your relationship above the reality. We met at work and it seemed from day one that all our other co workers tried to hook us up, so finally I asked her out to lunch by ourselves and it snowballed from there pretty easily.
Coworker told me we were practically the same person so it was bound to happen. It was my first serious relationship and we told each other we loved each other within two months, never went a day without at least speaking on the phone and was well liked by my family. We eventually started talking about our future, marriage and children.
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I met her parents about 4 months in. Somehow he managed to say something so rude in a polite manner trying his best not to offend me as he was simply stating a fact. For a year I put off studying until my girlfriend started asking me to go every once in a while. So, I studied with her dad. I had an above average knowledge of the bible.
Never read most of it but just from growing up catholic and things I randomly looked up on my own, I could tell her father was impressed over what was apparently more knowledge than the average first time bible student knew. After some prodding from both my girlfriend and her father, I started making more of an effort to go regularly while the relationship between me and my girlfriend grew more serious and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with her and her father started to support our relationship.
I was invited out for a day at the park with other Witnesses, to their home to play Rockband that was so popular at the time and also to meetings.
I started bonding with her dad and he told me how like me, he was raised catholic and converted to marry his wife. She came out with my family for 4th of July fireworks. Our first date was a rated R movie that she picked out. She loved my facial hair as pathetic as it was when I was younger. Even loved her birthday presents and bought me some too. Slowly, that changed though.
She started to shy away from holidays, birthdays and even started feeling guilty about sex. I started going to meetings.
Again, not regularly at first and then with some prodding I started to make the effort. All this time I was weary.
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I started realizing just how involved this religion is. How it will dictate my life. Then I started being told about preaching and going door to door and realized I would have no free time to just enjoy loving my girlfriend, or what I considered her at the time, future wife.
Without my idealized future blinding me, I noticed things. Things my love struck mind refused to see and understand before. Everyone had them during meetings. In meetings, those smiles were like their suits and dresses that they only ever wore for meetings. Everyone tried too hard to be nice and welcoming, but it never felt sincere. They were putting on a show for the elders and other witnesses trying to stand out as a model JW. I knew people like that when I went to Catholic Church when I was younger.
The ones that silently and sometimes not so silently judged everything about you and felt they were superior to you in every way. They would cuss out a waiter if they had to wait more than 10 minutes for their food during the lunch rush on Saturday and then put on the most fake smile you ever saw to you on Sunday. The hypocrisy of other criticizing other religions. One thing I remember her father saying is that he remembers going to church as a kid and them always passing around the collection plate.
That never happens at meetings. The donation box is near the door and you give as much as you can and you will never be bothered to donate.
Maybe I was too young to remember this when I went to church, but I never went to church 5 weeks in a row and ended the meeting with the guy up front telling the congregation they need to sacrifice for God and donate more like they did at the meetings. If they claim the idols and saints are against god, why do they honor anointed declaring yourself anointed seemed blasphemous to me and blindly follow the imperfect men running the religion? Of course he also pulled out the altar boy scandals but this was pre Australian Royal Commission.
The unsatisfying answers or straight out dodging of questions. I was always of the mind that if something is right, it can be questioned because you can support it. Our ex apr 22, including the jehovah s witnesses support group. Sounds like this month after the jehovah witness, he's recently posted an ex-jehovah's witnesses have affected your lives.
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